To date night, or not to date night…finding what works best for you.

Tim Challis has written an article for married couples stating that you don’t need a date night.

I agree with him that its good, its proper, and healthy to enjoy each others company in the ordinary of every day life. My wife and I enjoy our company, sitting watching a movie at home, washing up, gardening etc.

But, its worth noting I am the king of dag. I am a bit of a homebody. I am happy to stay at home. Trust me, I still wear jeans around the house that are 10 years old. I have tee shirts that are the same age. While I wouldn’t go as far as saying I am unkempt; I rarely get a hair cut…I had a hair cut last week; and was remarking to the barber that it got away from me a little, as I had planned to get it cut in Sept. I have a beard, a goatee. It suits my face much better than a full beard, or no beard. But, again, I don’t shave every day…sometimes I can go a week without shaving. And I can go months without trimming my beard. In fact, a couple of months ago my wife asked me to come for a pedicure with her… and I loved it, sitting in the massage chair for an hour, having the dry skin peeled off my feet, my legs massaged, my ingrown nails finally dealt with, and the dry flaky fungal nails buffed up to a point where I could say my feet looked good. We went for another one last week, and being Christmas time, when the staff joked about painting my nails, I called their bluff and had them paint my big toe nails dark green. ( And before the neo nazis start up…its only a bit of paint, it washes off, and it was a lot of fun, and I am very happy with my masculinity, and I have to say, it looks heaps better than fungal yellow.)

There is something inherently romantic  about having a date night or day.
And my wife and I  make time for a date night, or day. We discard the grungy every day clothes. I will have a shave and trim the beard…my wife will put on a little makeup – and we will dress up a little sharper then we would normally around the house. And I have to say, that when my wife dresses up, she looks hot. ( Don’t misread what I am saying here, I love my wife dearly, and she looks pretty no matter what she is wearing) When we walk out together we stand a little taller. We hold each others hand or arm, and my body language says to the world, back off, this is my woman. 

For us, going on a date night or lunch, means we don’t have to prepare a meal, nor do we have to wash up. It’s a break from the normal routine of life. I deliberately leave my phone at home…I don’t want to be distracted by emails, calls and face book. It’s a deliberate time and a deliberate action to make time with my wife – time where the routine needs of home can often interfere. And so to Tim, I say, “Yes, we do need a date night!”

I think for Tim Challis, its more of a personality, and love language issue about them being happy to stay at home…and it works for them. But for us… going out on a date night, going away on a holiday and exploring our world is all part of having fun together and exploring life together…and it works for us. In fact, I know it enhances our marriage, and together we appreciate each other more in the ordinary routine of life.


About Craig Benno

I'm an average aussie guy who has lived perhaps a not so average life.
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